Today I set out to be completely committed to doing what the Spirit was urging me to do. I didn’t want to just do what came to mind, but what was overwhelmingly evident that God was pushing me to do. I prayed before the day began that He would hound me until I submitted, or if I was going to pass, make it the hardest thing I could do. My hearts desire in this is to live a life completely led by the Spirit and not held back by fear or uncertainty. I am often disobedient and you probably are too when it comes to this.
I can remember over dinner with an older brother having a discussion about this very subject. His comment to me will never leave my memory. He said to me “We claim to do things because the Spirit told us to, but if we were honest we wouldn’t be saying we are Spirit led but the occasional listener.” The occasional listener is not something I am willing to be. I desire from the depths of my heart to be led and guided by the Spirit of the Living God no matter where it takes me. However, I am weak, and I often disobey due to fear and feelings of inadequacy. Maybe this doesn’t happen to you, but in my case, I am as Paul said “chief sinner”.
My journey started out pretty easy this morning. As I was getting the girls ready for school I was unable to let them leave without prayer. I know I should never let them leave the house without going before the Lord, but to my embarrassed, I always do. That was not only easy, but enjoyable for me to do as a father. The next task, however, was not as easy. There is two cars that are always next to each other at the bus stop. They stand there and talk while smoking and yelling at their kids. I have often thought of going over there and never do. Today that wasn’t an option. I happened to have the baby with me and used him as an excuse to not go. You know, cigarette smoke. As I walked in I battled and finally gave in. I grabbed one of my business cards and marched up to the car. I set my sights on the closest one thinking that I only had one card and she would get it. Nope, the adults were in one car, and the kids in a nother (shady if you ask me). I knocked on the window and said: “I was sitting over there and God told me to come and talk to you.” Boy did that throw them off. I ended up praying for them (even though they said everything was good in their lives and didn’t need prayer. They are the only ones in here, that is fo’ sho’).
I over spoke in the leadership meeting (I think), I asked the table next to us at lunch if they could use some prayer while I prayed for my food (they also had it all together, but I prayed for them anyway). I asked a lady in Office Max what miracle if she could have anyone she asked for, she would ask. I also told the cashier that “it’s okay, Jesus loves you”, and a man 1 month out of jail to call me when he gets to the end of his rope and I will show him where to find another one (oh, and added that the end of his rope will come, and he can be sure of that).
No one accepted Christ today, everyone looked at me like I was crazy, and while walking the park my heart got overwhelmed by the condition of this place. Being in touch with the Spirit makes the journey just a little different if you ask me. He laid some interesting things on my heart that will require some deep prayer and consideration also, it was a crazy day. There is a temptation to call today a failure, but the reality is that I was 100% successful. The way I see it is I was throwing seeds out. People heard Jesus’ name today, and the Spirit was the reason why. Who knows what is going on in their hearts at this very moment, and who knows what will come of the conversations. All I know is that I was obedient, and I know for a fact that is what He wanted. I learned to cast seed without expecting results, and I learned that life in the Spirit isn’t always comfortable, but always successful.
I wonder what tomorrow will bring as I journey with the Spirit.
“Every time you share the gospel of Jesus Christ with someone, you can consider it a success.” Ed Waken