Day 16: 237 days left.

Once upon a time, when I was younger, when people would doubt me that would just fuel my fire even more. One of the things that I used to say a lot was, “never doubt me.” Whenever someone would doubt me, I just figured that was a guarantee that whatever it was, was sure to happen. I hated people doubting me so much that I was sure that when they did I would prove them wrong.

Now, this is hardly the case. It seems that whenever someone doubts me it is nothing more than I had already convinced myself of. I am what you might call a dreamer. I have elaborate dreams that often, or mostly never come to fruition. I usually attempt to chase it down, but it doesn’t take long for me to find a road block and no detour. Usually the way it works is someone shoots it down before it even gets in the air. I come up with what I think to be great ideas just for people to tell me that they aren’t. I have no means to see a lot of these things take true form, and those who do, do not want to hear what I have to say.

After so many years of this, and after every time in my life that I was sure God told me to do something it turns out not to be very effective, my confidence has evaporated. Now it doesn’t take long for the idea to be thrown away, because I convince myself that it will not work before it leaves my mouth.

I have hit a crossroads. Today it was pretty much confirmed to me that my suspicions of the management and ownership of the gym have lost confidence in my abilities to lead the team. We have been getting last place in all of our competitions, and this will not convince people to stay next season. After all, who wants to be on a losing team? The odds truly are stacked against us. We are not just a first year program, but a true one. The majority of the girls have never competed, and the majority of those have never cheered before. We are truly a first year team. I am experiencing two very real emotions. One is that I am beginning to get down on my abilities to lead these girls to victory. Two, I am starting to get tired of the doubters and am ready to prove them all wrong.

The thing about odds is, God doesn’t really acknowledge them. In fact, I believe that God likes to work when the odds are unfavorable. See, my program is built on the foundation of scripture. The girls are being taught much more than cheerleading. They are being taught and shown how to behave like Christ in all circumstances and they don’t even know it. Our program will not use questionable moral measures to achieve success, we will do it ethically and integrally. Knowing that the creator is on my side, remembering all that He has done in this program already, is making me feel like the doubters are just fanning the flame. I have relieved myself of control of the outcome of this program and left it in God’s hands. You may be able to doubt me and my finite abilities, but in this case you are doubting the Creator God. I thank them for that, because all that has done is sealed my success.

For the glory of the Lord, we will not fail. Play the odds if you wish, but my God succeeds against all odds, and so will we.

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